The ONE Thing That Was Missing From My Offering

Last week, during my quiet prayer time, I experienced something so deeply moving that it felt like heaven broke through to meet me.

It has taken me a while to write and put it into words because it's difficult to confess and share these things.

If you’ve ever had one of those moments where you feel like you're taking 2 steps forward, only to find that you've moved a step backward, you'll relate with this post.

I have been wrestling with so much - worries, plans, and fears.

We’re in a season of transition: we're planning a huge move and nothing is certain. Our houses have yet to sell, and the time is coming when we will have to service the mortgage, pay rates, and pay rent. The numbers aren't adding up.

Business hasn't been the best this year. While God has been good, it hasn't grown in the right direction.

All this is happening while I'm still fully carrying the spiritual load at home, and making sure I do right by my husband and children.

Needless to say, my head and heart were full of concerns.

I was praying for clarity, direction, and peace. But as I sat there, I felt a gentle nudge, as if God was whispering, “Give it all to Me.”

In my mind’s eye, I pictured Jesus standing before me.

He was holding an offering plate, smiling at me with love and patience. It was as if He was inviting me to let go of everything I was clinging to, everything weighing me down.

At first, I hesitated. But then, one by one, I started to place things on the plate.

First, I put my business on the plate. Then came our finances, our properties, and all the things we own. It was hard, but it felt like the right thing to do.

Then, it got personal.

I placed my husband on the plate. I placed my children on it too. They were the hardest to let go off. Tears streamed down my face as I said, “Jesus, please take care of them. Please, don’t let them feel abandoned or lost. I love them so much. I need to know they’ll be okay.”

And Jesus, in His gentle and loving way, responded, “Of course I will. I love them more than you do.”

I thought I was done. I had given Him everything I could think of - my possessions, my plans, my loved ones.

But Jesus didn’t move. He stood there, still holding the plate out to me, His kind smile unchanged.

I thought, "What else are you waiting for, Jesus? I've given you everything. I've got nothing else to give."

Jesus didn't move. Neither did He say anything. He just stood there, smiling while holding the plate out.

It took me a few minutes, but then it hit me with a flash.

It was me.

He was waiting for ME. I hadn’t put myself on the plate.

It was me that He wanted - not just my things, my plans, or even my relationships. He wanted my whole heart, my whole life, my complete surrender.

Here's the thing. I've been been a disciple of Jesus for a hot minute now, and you would think that I have this down pat.

But if I've learned anything about this journey, it's that it's a journey.

There are days where I'm all in, and being the living sacrifice that He knows I can be. And then there are days where I unknowingly (or worse, knowingly) walk off the altar because of my pride, my ego, and my desire to be in control.

Two steps forward, and one step back.

Turns out, I had walked off the altar even without knowing it. But all that matters is that I'm moving forward.

It was a much-needed wake-up call.

There was nothing else to it; I climbed onto the plate. As I got onto the plate, I hugged Jesus tightly and whispered, “Don’t let go, Jesus.”

He smiled again and replied, “I won’t. Not until you do.”

This simple but profound encounter has stayed with me all weekend.

It reminded me that true surrender isn’t about losing something - it’s about gaining everything.

Jesus doesn’t ask us to let go of what we love to punish us. He asks because He loves us and wants us to trust Him completely.

As we start a new week, I invite you to take a moment to reflect.

Spend some quiet time in prayer or journaling.

Feel free to use my vision as your prayer: imagine Jesus standing before you, holding out an offering plate to you. What do you need to put on the plate today?

Place it in His hands, and trust that He will hold it with more love and care than you ever could.

If this exercise has given you an insight, please share it with me. I'd love to hear from you.